Harry Potter and the Attack of Fake Spoilers !?
Yes, this should have been the title of the 7th book. To all HP fans and particularly to Jo , I have a confession to make…
I gave in to my temptations and to my impatience. I downloaded the carpet version of the *leaked* Deathly Hallows. As soon as it was done , I started feeling guilty.I wanted to wait till Saturday , read with the world and relish every word , every line , every chapter of Harry’s last adventure. I started reading and I was engrossed. I finished the book in 8 hrs. I was left feeling quite not that full. It was like I was reading some fan-fiction. Plot inconsistencies , conflicting lines and most importantly , the final duel between Harry and Tom Marvolo Riddle was only 1 paragraph…?! The sharp words (arse – Hermy to Ron , bitch – Molly to Bella) left me wondering if you (Jo) had written this . It is highly unlikely for a responsible mother like Molly Weasly to use such a word in front of her children.
What I did get from the book , was the explanantion of the Deathly Hallows. Or maybe not !? In today’s world of Photoshop and morphing , it’s hard to tell the real from the fake. And being an amateur digital artist , I know the power and responsibility that comes with using a software as versatile as Photoshop. I could see that some of those pages had tell-tale signs of being doctored.
And to the arse , who put those pictures up….
Moron , why don’t you go shove your ass up in a Jet Plane’s turbofan. Fag , even if this is the real thing , then you had no right to take our fun away. You thought you’d be clever and try to impersonate Jo..?! You idiot , no one can do that , not even with Polyjuice. Do you even know what that is ? You thought you’d fool us into believing that it was Jo’s writing ?! You moron, you forgot to be consistent. You just don’t feel the way Jo does with words. So,just shut the fu*k up and melt away into nothingness.
Why does this always happen in America ? I didn’t see the UK , Bloomsbury version being leaked. And if Scholastic is doing this for publicity , then I think it is very cruel on their part.
Finally to the fans ,
We just have a short time to wait , so why don’t we take our mind off spoilers and sing the Hogwarts song…. All with me than … ” Nitwit , Oddment , Blubber , Tweak”….
Hogwarts , Hogwats ,
Hoggy Warty , Hogwarts,
teach us something please.
Whether we be old and bald,
or young with scabby knees.
Our heads could do with filling ,
with some interesting stuff.
For now their bare and full of air,
dead flies and bits of fluff.
So teach us things worth knowing ,
bring back what we forgot.
Just do your best,
we’ll do the rest,
and learn until our brains all rot.
– In loving memory of Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore ; Headmaster, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry ; Order of Merlin , First Class, for Grand Sorcery; Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot;Supreme Mugwump of the International Confederation of Wizards and the best possible wizard ever to have been born.
I made this in Photoshop and Apophysis. Aah ! With great power comes great responsibility…
No more spoilers please , let us wait with bated breath for the hour to come at last…
In the meantime , why don’t we share our experiences, fights , etc with out parents /siblings /cousins as to who gets the Potter first. Why don’t we all share what we had to go through to get a Potter book…
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